There is always that time of life when something happen to you and you tell yourself that everything is going to be just fine and you foolishly believe in yourself. Everyone tell you that everything is going to be fine and you believe them.
Time is moving forward, so does everything else. You move forward too. You keep talking, joking, smiling, laughing, socializing, doing your tasks, functioning. Everything seems to be fine. In fact, everything is fine except one thing. You. Your feeling. The inside of you. Maybe I should not say your heart because actually your heart is fine too, it keeps beating normally like it always does. Yes, you know you are absolutely not fine no matter how happy you seemed to be to other people.
You know you are not fine no matter how good you are doing on your works. You know you are not fine, because you are counting on the seconds, trying to make sure that you’ll still look fine in the next second. You are counting on the minutes, trying to make sure that whatever feelings you are hiding are not going to bursts out in the next minute. You are counting the days, trying to embrace all the good and bad news coming to you without really being able to give a feeling to response. You keep talking to yourself inside your head, trying to make sure you’re not going to explode any time soon.
However, you know that you will get better. You just have to wait for the time to come. You just need to hold on and keep moving at the same time.